


My fault

by fandomxtrash



Category: The Naturals - Jennifer Lynn Barnes
Genre: Comfort/Angst, Dean's a good boyfriend, F/M, Fluff, Mild Hurt/Comfort
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-06-01
Updated: 2018-06-01
Packaged: 2019-05-16 22:36:21
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 969
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14820207
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/fandomxtrash/pseuds/fandomxtrash
Summary: Missing scene from chapter 62 of the 3rd BookCassie tries to prepare for her meeting with nightshade and can't stay focused. Of course, Dean is there to calm her.(This is my first fanfic on ao3 so I don't know if the tagging worked as it was supposed to...)





	My fault

**Author's Note:**

> Soo... I finally did it! This is short, but I hope you like it anyways. 
> 
> Also English isn't my first language so if there are any mistakes in the spelling or grammar, feel free to tell me so I can correct them... or something... (I don't really wanna write one of these fics you can't read because you get distracted by all the mistakes ^^)

It felt like I was in shook.

 

I felt nothing. Just numb.

 

I sat on the bed. I had changed my clothes twice while waiting for Agent Sterling to pick me up and drive me to the prison, where I was supposed to make nightshade give us the antivenom for Briggs.

 

It wouldn't get in my head that I was about to talk to that monster.

 

That monster who was part of a cult who killed people.

 

Who felt like they were something better than us because of that.

 

Who killed Scarlett.

 

Who killed Beau.

 

Usually my mind went to overdrive and I started profiling someone. It didn't matter who - Lia, Michael, Dean, Sloane, Aaron, Beau, Nightshade, Sterling, Judd… It just kept my mind busy.

 

But right now, I couldn't even do that.

 

I couldn't think straight.

 

This felt so unreal, so much like one of those bad and unrealistic crime series where the main character would randomly have a connection to the killer, because it made the story more interesting. It wouldn't fit the BPE. I would never fit. But nobody cared about that.

 

_So what connection could I possibly have to Nightshade?_

 

I would've understood when he'd wanted to talk to Judd or Sterling… maybe even Sloane since the guy he just killed had killed her brother... but when I was new in the naturals programme, Nightshade had come to meet me this one day. Me. Not Sloane. Not Judd. Not Sterling. And I had this strange feeling that it hadn't been accidentally.

 

I flinched when I heard the door open. Somebody slit into the room and slowly walked towards me.

 

I knew it was Dean by the way his steps sounded on the carpet. But I couldn't bring myself to look at him.

 

_This is all my fault._ I felt a lump build up in my throat, so big I struggled to breath. _If nightshade hadn't used his last trick to talk to Me, Agent Briggs would be here now. Judd wouldn't have to think about his daughters death all over again. We would all be fine. We could continue investigating on the case. It was all my fault! It was all my fault! If I had realized earlier that Beau would target Aaron. If I had remembered nightshades face earlier. If I hadn't left my mother alone in the dressing room-_

 

"Cassie."

 

His calm voice and the hand that touched my neck snapped me out of my not so bright thoughts.

 

"Cassie. Look at me."

 

His other hand grabbed my right hand, his thumb started to caress over my hand, calm and soothing.

 

"Look at me", Dean repeated, his voice low and deep.

 

I swallowed hard before I made myself look at him. At his beautiful face.

 

He didn't make the attempt to smile at me. He didn't shoot me worried looks. I knew he was worried - about Me, about Briggs, about eberything - that was just Dean. But here and now, all he did was looking at me with most calming facial expression I've always seen.

 

I didn't know what it was, probably his eyes, that made me focus. He didn't need to say anything.

 

This wasn't the time for blaming myself. This wasn't the time to think about all the things nightshade had done. That I did.

 

I needed to stay focused.

 

Or I would most likely run right in his trap. Make this hole situation worse for everybody. Worse for me.

 

I felt a hand on each side of my face. He slowly ran his thumbs over my cheeks. His face was so close to mine I had to be careful not to get lost in his eyes.

 

"I love you cassie", he said. It was a whisper, quietly, but his voice was sure and steady. "I love you and I will never let anything happen to you. It's not your fault Nightshade poisoned Briggs. It's not your fault Judd can't stop thinking about Scarlett. It's not your fault that Beau killed Aaron. It's not your fault that your mother died."

 

I swallowed again as Dean kissed me on the forehead and hugged me.

 

I hugged back. I desperately pressed my body against my boyfriend's. I needed this. I needed him to come with me. I couldn't do this without him. I needed him with me…!

 

My breath shortened again. Dean must've felt it, because he hugged tighter for a few seconds before he pulled back and looked at me with this calm expression again.

 

"You can do this", he told me and ran a hand over my hair. "You are strong Cassie. So unbelievable strong."

 

His hand found it's way down my cheek and rested at my chin while he continued: "You will be fine, Cassie. I know it. He is a monster, but you are stronger than him. You can do this. Even if you don't see it now, believe me. I promise. We'll all be right here for you when you come back. _I_ will be right here."

 

He leaned forward and kissed me.

 

Slowly, careful and gentle.

 

It was so calming. I felt like he just gave me the strength I needed to do this.

 

Just as I wanted to kiss back, somebody knocked on the door.

 

"Cassie?" Judd.

 

Dean and I broke apart as he entered.

 

He looked at us for a brief second, his expression not giving away a single hint.

 

"Ronnie is here. We… we shouldn't waste any time…"

 

I nodded, Dean took my hand.

 

This is it then.

 

I stood and looked at Dean for one last time. I let go of his hand and then hurried down to the car together with Judd.

 

I was about to interrogate a serial killer. Again.

 

But this one wasn't just a serial killer. _This one was worse._


End file.
